Anyone who is reading this
Journal Entry: Thu Feb 7, 2008, 4:38 PM
Im fucked up I think, because I dont trust my family anymore, when they are mad at me and they try to make me talk, try to understand why the hell I did that, I dont answer them
I dont do a thing, I just look at them with a blank stare or crying (I tend to do that a lot since I was child) and what they do after that: they give the look meaning Youre so fucked up in the head or something like that.
I guess my dad was right
Im not the same little girl who loved to talk and play with everyone
.I guess Im more introvert now, dont want to speak with people unless they are talking to me, I dont even trust my own blood.
But hell I guess they deserved it
I think, first of all my mom, she acted like any mom, but sometimes she was meaner, made me feel like a worthless piece of shit and I couldnt say a thing to defend myself, because she was my mom and when I did it (one time)
it didnt had a happy ending and there I was a little brat begging for forgiveness
oh yeah she did magic with me
almost changed me to something she wanted (didnt talk a lot)
but the key word in here is almost.
But I guess thats the funny thing with my mom, she can get mad in no time and the next second shes all sweets
ah the irony.
But great job anyways mom
and remember when you asked why the hell I was all sorry, sorry that time? I guess this can answer it for you
or not, because I dont think you´ll see this.
Then my dad, well hes the one I could say I get along better of them, sometimes I can, sometimes I cant
also another ironic moment, because well he and mom made a great team in making a kid cry when they fought (well, I was a little girl and a crybaby, what can you expect?)
Also dad had his way of making me cry
he didnt had too much patience with me when he was teaching me stuff from school, I guess I had part of the guilt on that, but I tried to understand it
but the man didnt gave me to much credit for it.
Also how can I forget when he made me cry like a baby (in front of the family) when I told him I wanted to study art
.my moral went down, all the tragedies of the world united in one single moment.
Oh yeah, a lovely moment with daddy dearest
.fucker.
But well, he had lots of good things
..nah why Im even trying? I just gonna leave it in that way.
At least but not last, my brother Edú: what can I say about this jackass, when we were young, when mom and dad were fighting he was good enough to stop me from crying, made me feel better about it (and dont forget the fact that them always bought us stuff to regain our love
weird)
But we also acted like any brother and sister: like dogs and cats
and well things changed when the whole family moved to a new house, things changed
.we used to talk about anything
and now we talk once on a while.
Also he scares me, a lot, I dont see him as a brother anymore, I see him like a boss, I see my own brother like a friggin stranger, I tried sometimes to talk more to him but nothing, and well he talks more with our cousin about well guy stuff, but not even a single moment my brother wants to talk with me
.
And people ask why we have such a weird relationship
because of him, thats all, I tried to improve, but it wasnt enough
and Im done with him.
Well I guess thats it, the real reason why I want to get my own life
because I cant stand my family
Good way to feel better I think...put the blame on your family.
- Mood:
Neutral - Listening to: why
- Reading: later
- Watching: death Note
- Playing: -.-
- Eating: nothin
- Drinking: later
Devious Comments
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PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
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LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
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"Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. So, In the end, who's the real loser here?"
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-I've been living in Australia my whole life and I've never seen a koala bear before.
-I know what you mean. I've been living in Romania my whole life and I've yet to see a single vampire.
Love Integra?Join ~Integral-fanclub
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I dOnT carE..jKr wIlL nEvEr sInK My ship!!
PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
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LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
OVA Dawn Walter's vest was made from a simplicity pattern. Dawn Walter's vest used a McCall's pattern. Dark Walter's vest was purchased.
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I dOnT carE..jKr wIlL nEvEr sInK My ship!!
PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
-------------------------------------
LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
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"Hold on to your dreams, if you want to be a Hero you have to hold on to your dreams... and also your pride" ~
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-----------------
-I've been living in Australia my whole life and I've never seen a koala bear before.
-I know what you mean. I've been living in Romania my whole life and I've yet to see a single vampire.
Love Integra?Join ~Integral-fanclub
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The Bird Of Hermes Is My Name .. Eating My wings To Make Me Tame.
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I dOnT carE..jKr wIlL nEvEr sInK My ship!!
PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
-------------------------------------
LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
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I dOnT carE..jKr wIlL nEvEr sInK My ship!!
PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
-------------------------------------
LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
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>>Hitsuka Koshiro<< "The Sniper Ninja"
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DeathGod Productions... By Jinuso/Hajuso Saito..
- Youtube's Videos (AMV): [link]
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I dOnT carE..jKr wIlL nEvEr sInK My ship!!
PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
-------------------------------------
LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
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::Black wings, with a black heart of gold::
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I dOnT carE..jKr wIlL nEvEr sInK My ship!!
PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
-------------------------------------
LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
--
::Black wings, with a black heart of gold::
--
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I dOnT carE..jKr wIlL nEvEr sInK My ship!!
PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
-------------------------------------
LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
makes me happier to know that..
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Never take life seriously...
Nobody gets out alive anyway.
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I dOnT carE..jKr wIlL nEvEr sInK My ship!!
PrOud HarRy/LuNA fan!!
-------------------------------------
LaDiEs aNd GenTleMan sHe cAn dO matH wIthOuT hEr fIngeRs!
i'm really glad you liked it..
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=============== =================
Never take life seriously...
Nobody gets out alive anyway.
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